10:57 p.m. - 2005-01-02
year in review
Melinda's 2004 Year in Review
Well.. 2004 was quite an interesting year.
I started teaching again.. and teaching the one grade that I swore I never would.. third. Funny thing is, I love it more than I ever thought I could. I adore the school I am at, and have made some awesome friends at work. The kids I have in my class are truly some of the coolest kids I've ever met, and I have been blessed with having a good class size (i have less than i did when i taught k) and my kids are really fucking good. I look at some of the other 3rd grade classes and I sigh with relief each day that I have the kids that I do.
Relationship wise, this year has been very interesting... lots of crushes, some random hookups and that's been about it. Meeting J was unexpected and allthough I do really like the kid, we both know that its nothing anything near serious nor do either of us really have any emotions invested. Luckily for me he's a really good kisser and he can dance and sing. I figure we'll just end up at friends, and honestly, that's more than fine with me... but for now its fun to have a boytoy.
Still living with the folks, have changed my mind about 8578 times trying to figure out where I want to move to.. just focusing now on paying off the credit card I lived off of when I didn't work for a year and a half. I kinda have someplace in mind next year but dont want to jinx it this early by saying anything yet.
Myself - I've learned a hell of a lot about myself this past year. I learned that I'm a better teacher than I ever thought I was, that it wasn't me, it was the situation I was in before that made me so anti-teaching.
I've learned that I have the ability to really go out and get things that I want.. that all it requires is to DO it. Being scared of the reprecussions that may come can't keep me from at least TRYING to do something that I truly want to do.
I've realised that I'm at the point in my life as well that I'm ready for something more relationship wise and that settling for anything less than what I want just won't do. I've been alone for a very long time, and I think I'm finally to the point where not only do I know what I want, but I'm emotionally ready to get it and give it 100%.
Past- The past is finally that.. the past. If you hadn't figured out yet that I tend to hold onto shit... well.. I do. Brian and I stopped talking in Feb. and for a long time I mourned the loss of him... now, I realise that its for the best. Sure it sucks losing the friendship, but overall, it's better because I would have never gotten from him what I wanted. I wish him nothing but happiness though.. I hope he's doing well and I know he'll be an amazing doctor.
Family and Friends- The first half of the year allowed me to really get closer to a lot of my friends.. and I love them more than anything.
Mom's illness is still a mystery, but I know one day we'll figure it out.
Grandpa is doing as well as can be expected, but he's a stubborn old ass.. if anyone can beat this.. its him. :)
Overall 2004 was a really good year. The first half was really rocky with the no job thing, but once I got that shit in order, things all just seemed to fall in place. I have such high hopes for 2005. I have a really good feeling that things will go well this year.
xoxo
Mel
