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5:01 p.m. - 2005-06-27
parts from my book.. whatcha think?
I've been trying to work on this book/story. Here's something I wrote that I'd like some feedback on.


Not that anyone would try to steal this drivel, but obviously, all rights belong to me. ;)

~ "I figured out this... no one will kiss the way he does, no one will make my stomach flip the way he did, but not because they don't have the ability, but because I won't let them. Allowing him to hold this power over me and to cloud my judgement has been so unfair.... to him, to me, and to any other man who watned a chance with me."
~ "I have learned the lesson that making out with a 21 year old boy solely because he as the same mouth as Joshua is probably not a good idea... especially when no matter how hard I try... he kisses horribly. Plus, he like listens to death metal, and really, who wants to be romanced by someone who thinks screaming is a talent?"
~ "I spoiled him terribly over the years. Not a holiday went by that wasn't recognized in some small way. I created this monster in myself.. this creature who had to be like always thoughtful and perfect and overly understanding and accomadating to him. Nevermind the stress that I experienced... nevermind the drama in my life... it paled in comparisonto his.. ALWAYS... well... at least in his mind.. and honestly? After a while.. in mine too."
~ "His un-human like avility to control his emotions... its this thing about him that I openly despise, bitch about and condem him to hell for, always proclaiming that I'd never want to "not feel"... when secretly, its all I want".

any and all thoughts/comments would be appreciated

*without giving too much away, the set up of the book is her journal, that's why its written in first person and in the format it is*

xoxo
Melinda

 

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